durian vs the bowen arrow.

colin gave me the idea of a durian and he reminded me unintentionally of napoleon dynamite's will to score chicks by having bowen arrow skills. so here goes the review:

Damage:
Bowen arrow 9/10, a shot to the heart and you die or in other words fall in love if it was fired by a magical little pixie fairy.
Durian 10.5/10, step on it and it hurts like shit already.

Physical presence
Bowen arrow 8/10, scary but not enough to piss your pants
Duria 12304/10, the smell comes from all palpable levels of the human nostrils, yet, it can smell nice when you want it to smell nice and it can smell bad when you want it to smell nice so it smells bad.

Trajectory
Bowen arrow 0 - 180 degrees, its very fast and very accurate with a goods marksman. If it were you or me, it prolly would be better just to use it like a police baton for safety of the user.
Durian 0-720 degrees- tossed like a shot put or a javelin or even as a land mine..you'll find yourself in trouble..

and so you see durian wins plainly because it has a taste while a piece of wood merely taste like a piece of wood.

Now, theres alot of durian around malaysia at this time, i can even smell it in my nose.

hope you like the review,
izuluzi

THE 80's

The 80's were prominent for a rise in good music. Metal took a stand by then but i'm at this point more intrigued at the more sophisticated and dynamic music which is hard to write, let alone hard to understand.

It is the hilarious sort of music that you would expect to be written by the makers of the basic toilet bowl or the creators of monty python-equally important in all aspects.

For example the music video for one of the famous INXS which got me intertwining my band of of sour liquorice. Get this, a drummer playing with no drums and a guitarist playing a guitar without a guitar.

In conclusion i think one of the best lyrical songs of the 80's is by Prefab Sprout, with their song-The King of Rock 'N' Roll.

And the godly lyrics are on the basis of hotdogs, frogs and Albuquerque.

The choreograph of the dancing is absolutely innovative and remarkably 'serious'. Not to mention a splendid approach to a random theme and.........................................THEIR ENGLISH. Yes, finally an english pop band of the 80's. These are the lyrics:



All my lazy teenage boasts are now high precision ghosts
And they're coming round the track to haunt me.
When she looks at me and laughs I remind her of the facts
I'm the king of rock'n roll completely
Up from suede shoes to my baby blues

Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque
Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque

The dream helps you forget you ain't never danced a step
You were never fleet of foot, hippy.
All the pathos you can keep for the children in the street
For the vision I have had is sweeping
- New broom, this room, sweep it clean

Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque
Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque
High kickin' dandy, fine figure fine cut a fine figure fine oh yeah ;
Long legged candy, fine figure fine cut a fine figure fine oh yeah ;

Now my rhythm ain't so hot, but it's the only friend I've got
I'm the king of rock'n roll completely
All the pretty birds have flown now I'm dancing on my own
I'm the king of rock'n roll completely
- Up from, suede shoes to my baby blues

Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque
Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque
High kickin' dandy, fine figure fine cut a fine figure fine oh yeah ;
Long legged candy, fine figure fine cut a fine figure fine oh yeah ;
Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque
Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque




Watch the video it WILL give you a good laugh and a little brain damage.

Izuluzi.

Futsal good.

Football is dead in our country so we turn to the next best thing, futsal.

Malaysia are currently ranked 17th in the world at this sport. But after losing 7-1 and 7-0 to argentina and oz respectively that rankings a load of shit since argentina are ranked 7th. Plus, all the futsal players were mostly malay. No chinese? Thats prolly another reason why we never improve.

After witnessing the inevitable under achievement of our nation HK, Adam, my bro and i went and bought tickets for the finals between argentina and brazil.


These two teams are bitter rival in the 11 man sport and it was no different here.

Furthermore, there were lots of people in the stadium , even more than the amount John Rambo kills in all his 4 movies put together. I have to say it was a great atmosphere:

The match was awesome. Brazil though played exceptionally well and the stadium erupted when they nailed their first just before half time. However as half time approached i felt i was in for the shock of my life.

I thought during half time there were to be some fun and games for the crowd to join in, instead they brought in half time comedians/circus people:

Yes, these comedians are known as break dancers. Some were good but a majority of them, just stayed in this position as above. Yet another dampener to a great occasion.

In the end Brazil comfortably slotted in another 3 goals thus summing up the KL world 5's.

In the end, the game was quality and the crowd was great., really great. I felt right at home-watching foreigners playing instead of our own.

The boy band.

We all were young once and especially those born in the 80's or 90's experienced the invasion of the boy bands. Yes, Code Red, N'Sync, 911, Boyzone and the ultimate group-Backstreet Boys. Although, it was debatable if N'Sync or Backstreet Boys were better.

But there is a general trend. I'm sure most of us as young kids with minimal taste in music loved these boy bands, i know i did.


But as we grew older, we grew cooler, taller and more mature. Thus, with our maturity in tact we decided to detest the gayish acts of boy bands and post some extremely mature photos on the internet.



Unfortunately, physically matured, i still do hang on to my past and i still like those big hits achieved by these boy bands especially the Backstreet Boys, i can't seem to not like their songs, for some reason it's different from terrible music now. Trust me, i'd rather hear them on the radio. Although they are most formally extinct they have impacted us one way or another. So please please please if you want to remain cool at least:

The Newspaper.

Facial Reconstruction.





Ahh..Football football..As it appears on this picture this guy just loved the game to much. As for the guy in the blue, i think he's just lucky he spent most of his career on the sidelines, imagine what else could have been reconstructed if the pressure had got to him.

However there are some who should take plastic re facial construction into consideration. Just kidding. No, seriously, they should. Yes, our beloved Ram and KF. Some what minutely handsome at young but then nature took its course. God save their souls.


















Stupidity.

Other than those two people above who complete this word wholly, there are more alerting issues. Yes, where theres amazingly stupid news there are the odd Malaysians who feel they should be credited for such a move.

Why would our car manufacturers go solo with the likes of GM and VW wanting to help promote quality engines. I'll tell you why, other than a brave move they choose to give us low end quality stuff so that it can remain a monopoly and at least at an affordable price for the middle income earners. I bet our export quality begs to differ. I hope.

Miscellaneous. WTF.

Are they really praying, or do they just hate NST readers. Those that don't know this hand gesture, it's WTF in italian. Yes, i learnt this on an educational show known as Russell Peters-He's from India..lol..

So, i can now conclude that newspapers are a very useful way to transfer information of any nature whether cynically intended or made to laugh at. All in all, there are many resemblances to what is happening in the newspaper and whats around you. Apparently, the newspaper is defined to report whats around you anyway so i guess the penultimate sentence did not make so much sense.

Reporting live form USJ,

Izuluzi

15 minutes.

As usual, the weekend passes by and we go to channel 812 or 813 to watch our premiership sides battle against one another. During the half time interval which lasts for approximately 15 minutes, some of us choose to go to the loo, some of us choose to wait to go to the loo until the end of the match, or some may retreat for a 15 minutes skipping drill as a warm up to general exercise the following morning.

However, we could watch our very own Shebby Singh talk shit over and over again about how bad the defense is and how bad the offense is of either side, it seems as though he is talking about our national team, or Tottenham for that matter(Tottenham, a shocking resemblance to the team he supports)

But since Liverpool were losing at half time a nil down to a Boateng goal(Middlesborough), it seemed a reasonable idea to taunt about the pressure surmounting on benitez and the cause of it:

izul-Holy Diver says:
what benitez doing lah?

athan.Jon says:
u ask him lor

athan.Jon says:
1800-An-Field

izul-Holy Diver says:
you mean 1-800-lo-sersville

athan.Jon says:
but you said you want to contact beniteZ

athan.Jon says:
not old trafford or ferguson

athan.Jon says:
so why dial that?

izul-Holy Diver says:
you think liverpool got chance win title this season if they loose this one??

izul-Holy Diver says:
maybe get advice lah..benitez is 1-800-suck my balls-and whack his one with a frozen sledgehammer

athan.Jon says:
=.=

athan.Jon says:
u try lor

athan.Jon says:
that one will connect with an outerspace number

athan.Jon says:
maybe martians

athan.Jon says:
like 1million digits lol

izul-Holy Diver says:
i dont get that, maybe he just doesn't have balls?

athan.Jon says:
1-800-suck my balls-and whack his one with a frozen sledgehammer

athan.Jon says:
maximum is 12 digits

athan.Jon says:
13 is tollfree

athan.Jon says:
19241941412 is outerspace

athan.Jon says:

izul-Holy Diver says:
hmm..like addidas says, impossible is nothing, maybe its retard hotline?

izul-Holy Diver says:
13 tollfree, where, mainland or sentosa?

athan.Jon says:
your father's home

izul-Holy Diver says:
HUHU..My father momentarily is Rafa lah..I just realised i was adopted, found out-->no nuts.

athan.Jon says:
oh

athan.Jon says:
okay

athan.Jon says:
nice to see you blaming liverpool's manager for your lack of manhood

izul-Holy Diver says:
nah, for his..

athan.Jon says:
heh but you also could be ferguson's illegitimate son

athan.Jon says:
i think rafa's balls bigger

athan.Jon says:
than the scotman

izul-Holy Diver says:
but legitimately always a winner

izul-Holy Diver says:
but got no prize lah for big balls, small ball iwn trophy puas hati lah

athan.Jon says:
wtf

athan.Jon says:
u not making sense

athan.Jon says:
i shall bath now

athan.Jon says:
then watch liverpool win 301

athan.Jon says:
3-1

izul-Holy Diver says:
301?? levi jeans??

athan.Jon says:
so desu

athan.Jon says:
watashi no levi jeans desu

izul-Holy Diver says:
i think its 501

Yes, 15 minutes were used to the best of my ability. Really interesting talking about football in a different perspective. Atleast better than listening to Steve McMahon or Shebby Singh anyway.

Music covers.

Covers of musical bands are the attempt to reincarnate a song to a better and broader extent. Including more higher technical abilities and soloing of different taste. Even the changing of genre of the song can be done with detail and precision for its audience. We then find how diverse styles of music is.

Man, some of the pics and wallpapers for certain bands are way cool after browsing, besides the first good impression of something is the looks of it. Hey, listen to these songs ok.

Examples:

Britney Spears----------->Children Of Bodom
Song: Oops I Did It Again.

Metallica----------->Trivium

Song: For Whom The Bells Toll.

Dio----------> Killswitch Engage

Song: Holy Diver.

Justin Timberlake-------->Lost Prophets

Song: Cry Me A River.

Metallica------->Machine Head

Song: Battery.

In the end, you should just listen to covers, which ones of them are better than the original and which ones are worse. After all discovering music overlapping genuinely and comparing them is the key to good music i guess, although it is techincally considered stealing the props from the makers of it..lol.